Two issues in the past few days suggest that there is a serious job to do to change the national dialogue about young people. And as a party and government we are ideally placed to take the lead.

The row over the Mosquito, the device that emits a high-pitched sound to disperse groups of teenagers, is perhaps the most depressing. Is there any other section of society where it would be acceptable to force them to move on by assaulting them in this way? There are estimated to be 3,500 of these devices in public spaces that should be for everyone. They don’t target law-breaking or anti-social behaviour but every young person indiscriminately. Is that the best we can do to engage with young people?

On the same day, I was asked for my reaction to a ‘statistic’ that one in five people had been assaulted by a young person. This turned out to be, predictably, an internet-based survey. Yet it was clear from the phone-in that the public believed this to be true and wanted more, not fewer, measures such as the Mosquito to tackle the problem of ‘young thugs’.

However, every genuine statistic shows crime falling, but the fear of crime rising. So perhaps now is a good time to reflect on what the cause and effect is here. Does the fear of crime and the perception of young thugs roaming our streets come from personal experience, or has it been fuelled by the constant ramping up of the issue – all the better for political parties to come to the public’s rescue with the latest sweep of measures to tackle the problem.

Yet we all know that the overwhelming majority of young people do not fit these stereotypes. At the FE College where I work we have over 7,000 fantastic students under 18 who are a world away from the tabloid portrayal of their age group. And this isn’t to be naïve. There have been some horrific incidents of knife crime in the past year – with young people usually the victims as well as the perpetrators. And anti-social behaviour genuinely does blight the lives of many of the people we came into politics to represent, as I heard for myself at a public meeting Charles Clarke and I held in Norwich last week.

But these are the exceptions, not the rule. Beneath every hoodie is not a vicious young thug waiting to pounce. So what can we do to change his debate and engage better with young people?

First, we need to remember that the best way to gain respect is to show a little. Yet the signals we send out nationally suggest a decline in our respect for those under 18. After years of increasing the rights of those aged 16 to 18, there is now a concerted effort to reverse the trend. Buying cigarettes has been banned, the driving age looks set to rise and alcohol sales outside pubs may be restricted to over 21s. And, most significantly perhaps, the choice of whether to continue in education beyond 16 is to be removed, backed up by a series of threats and punishments to young people and their parents. And we seem no further forward on giving 16 and 17-year-olds the democratic rights enjoyed by all other income tax payers – the vote.

Second, let’s keep up the fantastic work we are doing in communities across the country to improve the lives of young people. The new £31m fund announced this month by Kevin Brennan is precisely the way to address the challenges faced by young people. This fund will benefit nearly 100 third sector organisations to deal with a range of issues including teenage pregnancy, youth participation, bullying and support for children in care. And even more exciting was the flagship policy of Ed Balls’ excellent Children’s Plan which will see £225m made available to build or upgrade 3,500 play areas across the country and £160m for new youth facilities shaped by young people themselves.

And third, let’s mind our language. Hoodies don’t need necessarily need hugging. But they don’t need demonising either. If we could step away from the soundbites and discuss this rationally, it is perfectly possible that we could end this tabloid bidding war between the parties and demonstrates the respect for young people that we demand from them.