In the letter they claim that the cause of Dr Kelly’s death, suicide by a self-inflicted wound to the left wrist, which the Hutton Inquiry identified, is ‘extremely unlikely’. This will add pressure on Dominic Grieve, the attorney general and Ken Clarke, the justice secretary, for another public inquiry. Pressure may also come from transport minister Norman Baker, who has written a book concluding that Dr Kelly’s life was ‘deliberately taken by others’. We have a serving minister who believes a British government scientist was assassinated as part of a deliberate plot, which was then hushed up.

Dr Kelly’s suicide, a terrible tragedy, is fast-becoming the conspiracy nuts’ cause celebre. They claim Hutton was a whitewash, that Kelly’s right arm was injured so that he couldn’t have cut his own left wrist, that shadowy figures were seen before he went missing, that he predicted his own death with the words ‘I will probably be found dead in the woods’, that ‘there wasn’t enough blood’, that you can’t die from severing your own ulnar artery.

There are different kinds of conspiracy theory: ones that events were faked, such as the moon landings or that ‘official versions’ of events are false, such as the Kennedy murder or the death of Diana. There are those that believe in meta-conspiracies: that the Jews secretly run the world through their grip on business, finance and the media; that freemasons are secretly in charge; that secret societies from the Bilderberg group, or Opus Dei subvert democracy. I remember seeing some private polling suggesting that a sizeable chunk of Britain’s Muslims believe that 9/11 was a plot by the US and Israeli secret services, not terrorists. There are plenty of people who believe that no Jews were killed in the Twin Towers, having been warned to stay at home. There’s a whole industry of people who believe 9/11 was a set-up to provoke a war in the middle east. Even within the Labour party, there are those that suggest Hugh Gaitskell was murdered by the KGB to make way for their agent Harold Wilson. These conspiracy theories are anchored in the counter-culture of the 1960s, and in a mindset that nothing is as it seems, that shadowy forces direct the shape of our society, and that only the enlightened few can see the ‘truth’. It borders on paranoia, with a view that ‘they’ will stop at nothing to keep the truth hidden.

The ideal antidote to all this nonsense is David Aaronovitch’s newish book Voodoo Histories, which formed part of my holiday reading this summer. From the Protocols of the Elders of Zion, through to Norman Baker’s belief in the assassination of Dr Kelly, he effectively debunks the myths and lies which surround some of the great events of the past century. The sad truth is that people being driven at high speed without seatbelts stand a high chance of crashing and dying; that 9/11 was caused by the terrorists who flew the planes, not the CIA, and that a British government scientist was put under such intolerable pressure that he took his own life, and that there were no Iraqi assassins hiding in the bushes.

Part of me thinks that Grieve and Clarke should acquiesce to demands for a new inquiry, in order to prove the conspiracy nuts wrong. But the nature of conspiracy nuts is that they can explain away any new information which disproves their theory as being part of the conspiracy. A future inquiry which proved that David Kelly deliberately died of self-inflicted wounds would not assuage the doubters; it would merely change the terms of their doubt. It would add fuel to the conspiracists, like Norman Baker, and possibly provoke a new edition of his book. That should be reason enough for us to oppose a new inquiry, and disappoint the people who think you can fake a moon landing, kill a president or a princess, or bring down two skyscrapers without anyone finding out.

Photo: hotdiggitydogs