If you were politically active in the 1970s and 1980s, here is a list of causes celebre that might have had you reaching for the megaphone: apartheid, the arms race, youth unemployment, gay rights, trade union rights, poverty pay, and perhaps even devolution. How many youth unemployment rallies have you been on this year? How many protests against poverty pay? Labour’s progress in these areas may not have caused spontaneous demonstrations of support, but the reality is that Britain is a better place than it was under the Tories.

On a number of fronts – from the things that we used to take to the streets about to the things like literacy, numeracy, and cancer treatment that didn’t get us off the sofa but we still cared about – this Labour government has delivered. It’s not just on the broad socio-economic canvas that Labour is bringing stability and social justice; Labour’s hand can be seen in the fine detail and brushwork, too. Relatively small schemes such as Sure Start and inexpensive programmes such as neighbourhood wardens still transform the lives of those directly affected.

But this isn’t yet another article about how marvellous this Labour government is – after all, the national papers are already filled with enough glowing praise and plaudits. You can hardly open a page in the Guardian without its positive words of encouragement for Labour ministers falling into your lap.

No, this article is about why, with all the successes of the government, from conquering youth unemployment to reforming the House of Lords, the so-called left in Britain is so comprehensively miserable. You would think that our Labour government had abolished pubs and banned chocolate.

It’s a phenomenon that induces head scratching. Why should people who spent the best years of their lives attending Labour party meetings, going to leftwing seminars on ‘where next for socialism’, marching with their placards, picketing Tory ministers and having apoplexy every time Margaret Thatcher appeared on the Nine O’ Clock News be so negative about a progressive, reforming Labour government?

There seem to be three main strands to the Miserable Tendency. First, refusniks. Some people in the Labour party voted against Tony Blair for the leadership in 1994, voted against the new Clause IV in 1995, voted against the Road to the Manifesto in 1996, ignored the National Policy Forum, voted against ‘Blairites’ on the NEC every year, and boycotted the Big Conversation in 2004. This group cannot be viewed as New Labour’s greatest fans. Fair enough. In politics you don’t have to persuade everybody, just a majority.

One chap I met in Billericay when I was the parliamentary candidate in that seat in 1997 loathed Blair and all his works to the point where he refused to hand out any leaflet with the phrase ‘New Labour’ on it. He was an early example of the refusnik. Some hate New Labour because they believe in an alternative strand of socialism, perhaps a modern variant on Bennery, and can be found in the Socialist Campaign Group in parliament, and writing in the pages of Tribune. They know what they oppose, but don’t have an alternative beyond vague slogans about nationalisation and disarmament.

Second, the Guardianistas. These people are masters of inactivity. They imbibe their daily dose of Roy Hattersley, Gary Younge, or George Monbiot, agree with every anti-Labour word of every column, and do absolutely nothing about it. They have no alternative, no positive engagement, no suggestions for change. They don’t like the Labour party in government because in their hearts they don’t believe that is what the Labour party is for. These armchair socialists are far more comfortable with a Tory government, because then they really have got something to complain about. They nodded vigorously when the Guardian leader writers called for the people of Hartlepool to vote Liberal Democrat in the by-election to ‘teach the government a lesson.’ Luckily very few Guardianistas actually live in Labour areas.

Third, there is the most recent and most insidious group of the miserati. These are careerists who think that for their own stars to rise in politics, they must attack Blair. Theirs is a viscous cocktail of ambition, bitterness and failure. They believe that in some alternative-universe Labour, their true talents will be spotted.

Some are recent converts, having climbed aboard the Blair bandwagon and jumped off when the ride got a little bumpy. The careerists are playing a very dangerous game indeed, because they wrongly believe that the alternatives in politics are between the current Labour government, and some other Labour government that would do some more of the things they want. In truth, the choice is between this Labour government and a Conservative one led by Michael Howard.

The irony is that, while you will find some of the Blair government’s greatest critics inside the Labour party, always ready with a whinge and a whine, some of the Blair government’s greatest fans are to be found outside the Labour party. You can find fans of the Labour government amongst the security guards and office cleaners on the national minimum wage, or the young mums and dads in receipt of the working family tax credit, or the ordinary families of Baghdad, Basra or Kandahar.

There’s six months until a general election. Labour’s campaign song should be Reasons to be Cheerful. And the ranks of the miserati need to cheer up. Unless we win, the Tories will be back, and we’ll be dusting down the placards and megaphones as the unemployment figures creep up to three million and hospitals close. Now that really would be miserable.

How to spot a whinger

Refuseniks
• Believe in an alternative strand of socialism to New Labour. Look out for vague slogans around nationalisation and disarmament.
• Voted against Blair in 1994, the new Clause IV in 1995 and Road to the Manifesto in 1996. Have opposed Blairite candidates for the NEC and boycotted the Big Conversation this year.
• Can be found writing in the pages of Tribune and among the Socialist Campaign Group in parliament.

The Guardianistas
• Lap up the Guardian’s attacks on Labour and approved of its endorsement of the Lib Dems in Hartlepool.
• Avid readers of Guardian columnists like Roy Hattersley, George Monbiot and Gary Younge.
• Masters of inactivity and armchair socialists, much happier with the Tories in power so that they have really got something to complain about.

The Miserati
• Early passengers on the Blair bandwagon in the mid-1990s, many jumped off when the ride got a little bumpy.
• Careerists who believe own positions can best now be advanced by attacking Blair.